Monday, September 24, 2007
I (stolen from Skinny Black Chick)
I am not: you typical black chick. I hate most new hip hop, don't praise your Jesus, nor do I carry lessons learned from mommo or grandmomma.
I hear: basslines before lyrics in most songs
I regret: ignoring years of red flags and making a man my entire world.
I care: constantlyimproving myself and my writing
I always: think of my father in making life decisions. I question whether that would make him proud.
I long to: fall deeply in love again and build a life with someone.
I feel alone: when I reach out and there's no one there and no one trying to be there.
I hide: well....not much. I pretty much put everything out there.
I sing: bluesy love songs, nearly everyday or whenever I'm inspired. And I do pretty well!
I dance: My ASS OFF! Or til I sweat as if is one of the few things in life that truly make me happy.
I write: because it is the easiest way to express my thoughts. It takes the burdens off my chest, organizes my thoughts and helps me express my inner most thoughts and desires.
I breathe: music. Without it I would curl up and die.
I play: with the thought of doing musical theater. Don't know how I'd get started but I'd love to do it if not be one time.
I miss: my Daddy. He was my soulmate in life.
I search: for peace of mind.
I say: too much and that's usually not enough.
I feel: full of anticipation, like I've only just begun.
I succeed(ed): by learning from my mistakes.
I fail(ed): at trying to make a relationship work with a man who did not and would not love me
I dream: of the happily ever after, big house, 3 rugrats, family vacations and retiring with my dearest near the water and ending cozy evenings together with a bottle of chianti. (ya know after the nightly, hot, sticky, Wild Kingdom monkey sex).
I sleep: in next to nothing with a kitty kat purring on my pilow
I wonder: if the big dream will ever happen
I worry: that I'll never be able to have a family the traditional way ie. with a husband
I have: abandonment issues; a fear of being left, discarded, pushed aside, thrown away and forgotten about
I give: too much of myself to unworthy, nonreciprocating people.
I fight: with my inner critic 24/7.
I am: a masterpiece of perfect imperfection. (per Skinny girl! Nice!)
I can’t: be intimate with someone without catching feelings, swim, or count well in my head.
I will: one day be a published writer, a mother, a homeowner, see Europe and Africa, perform on stage, sing for a crowd and direct a film.
I can: be a total child at time.
I would: be a real force to be reckoned with if I could break my habit of laziness and procrastination and get organized.
I might: adopt children one day. I always wanted a large family.
I like: holding and being held. Can never get enough of it.
I love: writing, gossping, dancing, drinking, sex, porn, cats, beer, guys with sideburns, cheese, citylife, flip-flops, sunshine and arched eyebrows.
I smile: when complimented.
I frown: when I am annoyed which makes up about 65% of my regular day
I read: lots of mindless stuff on dead bodies, serial killers, atheism, sociology, pop culture, black culture, dating and single girl life. Crap.
Too Old for Low Rise Jeans?
What ever happened to...
Monie's in the middle (where she at?) In the middle. Monie's in the middle (where that at?) In the middle. Monie's in the middle (where she at?) In the middle. Go Mo, Mo, where is she? Monie's in the middle.
I think we were introduced to her when she did Ladies First with Queen Latifah back in the very early '90's. I remember I made it my mission to learn every word to "Its a Shame (My Sister) cause she had that crazy flow of rapping at lightening speed. And I did learn every word. I thought she was a great female rapper.
Where she's at:
Apparently she's now a DJ in Philly, working the morning rush hour. She's also a single mother of three and is slated to do a comeback album. We'll see.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Monie_Love
I remember he was like the ooogliest rapper out at that time but every radio station (ok, 92Q) was cranking Flavor in Ya Ear like every 15 mins and every lil mofo in school had to know this one word for word. I specifically remember being in Reisterstown Road Plaza (when people used to hang there) with my best friend at the time, when a store started blaring this song and me and my friend stopped what we were doing and broke into a full on dance, right there in the middle of the mall. Good times.
His new flavor:
Apparently he left Bad Boy records in 1997 and did a new album with some Street Life records which I don't think anyboy has ever heard of and basicaly fell off the scene.
The rapper reappearred in 2002 on the remix of the G-Dep song "Special
Delivery" with P. Diddy, Keith
Murray, and Ghostface Killah, which
can be found on the Bad Boy album We Invented the
Remix Vol. 1. After starting his own imprint, named MackWorld Records,
Mack
released the single "Mack Tonight" b/w "Hip-Hop Life" in 2006. Plans for a third album,
tentatively titled The Affiliation, were announced, scheduled for release
sometime in 2007.
The girls look so good, but their minds are not ready, I don't know, I rather talk to a woman, cause her mind is more steady, so here we go.
He was like 14 when his album dropped and was getting much play on the defunct Jukebox Network (anybody remember that?) But he was kinda cute with his wavy, lil head and his first single.
Update
Looks like another tried to change the formula and fell off. Apparently with his follow-up album he went from cute and sweet, street and thug.
They featured Chi with a slightly more mature voice. Overall, the album's theme
is of a kid who is getting too big for his britches. He speaks of preferring to
date older women, gun
toting, and marijuana smoking, which at
the time seemed cute and laughable. It received mixed reviews for lyrics that
seemed uneven...Then even worse, he became a thug:
Shockingly, the next time many would see Chi Ali was on the show America's Most Wanted in 2001 for the death of Sean Raymond, the brother of his then girlfriend. Chi evaded police for a number of weeks before his capture. Reports at the time indicated that the incident stemmed from the loss of $300 and an unknown number of CDs. Chi Ali is currently serving a 14 year sentence at Elmira Correctional Facility, in Elmira, NY.
So sad when that happens.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chi_Ali
I...........am the magnificent.
Another one of my early '90s, Jukebox network, heavily rotated video faves. This was my joint and is still apart of my old school hip hop jams mixes CDs.
Where is the magnificent now?
Looks like he tried. He put out a few more albums, which unfortunately went nowhere. But he does have a Myspace page (www.myspace.com/specialedmusic).
Well, at least, he's not locked up.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Special_Ed
It's time to get ill, we got the pill...
Remember these stanky rappers? I remember dancing to their MC Hammer beats and raunchy, booty-shaking lyrics like I was stank myself. I wasn't, but it was fun. I remember when Juice Got 'em Crazy came out and we were rocking it in middle school.
Well?
Guess everything MC Hammer touched turned to sawdust cause their careers went too. Apparently they just disbanded. Oh well. Hopefully, they're not on welfare.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oaktown%27s_357
My best friend was in LOVE with them. She made me stop what I was doing one day to listen to the bass-line of Can't You See. Coming out, under Biggie's reign, they were tight, I had to admit and finally got into them. I remember there was the real pretty Keisha rocking the half-way bald look and making it look hot, then the Pam, the one we all assumed was a lesbo based on her mannerisms and depp voice and we couldn't quite see her with a dude though she tried and Kima, the not-so-quite cute one. Actually, she was kinda funny looking. Even with the long weaves.
What up?
Apparently they are back together and working on a new album. Keisha ass went and married Omar Epps (ok, then!) and I read that there will be a 4th member. We'll see.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Total_%28band%29
I used to love me so them. I had every album and would be up in my room perfecting my rendition of Weak til my throat hurt. And how about their song Downtown. They had al us high school girls openly singing about a man going down (some of dreaming, some not). Funny looking, yeah but they had all the hits. Everything they put out was a big hit. I was mad when Coko, tall ass decided she was too good and went solo. Didn't go nowhere.
Update
They are getting back together and have already started performing. And I'm happy to hear it! They were my girls! Youtube is suppose to have some recent clips.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/SWV
I wanna sex you up!
Awwwww, yeah! That was the song. THE song, that after hearing it for the first time convinced me that I must lose my virginity and quick!!! I am not playing. I saw Bryan Abrams fine behind talking about "dooooooo meeeeeeee" on TV and bout lost my mind. Who cares about the other ones. He was the FINEST white man I'd ever seen in my life and whatever he said do, I did. I would. It's done. Even girls who'd never looked at white boys before (unlike me) were like dayy-yumm! I was ready to marry that man. Bryan, not the rest of them.
What now?
Mid-90's, they couldn't hang. What else is new? Epic records dropped them and they broke up. The curly-headed dude Sam, became a producer and married Tamyra Gray. Kevin (the token black) is doing gospel and Mark is doing insurance (uh what?). As for fine-ass Bryan, you should have seen my jaw drop when I saw his fat behind on the VH1 series Man Band, trying to assemble some sort of washed-up, former boy band group for reality TV. Damn! Were options that limited? Say it aint so. Damn.....it is.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Color_Me_Badd
We always hang in a buffalo stance, we do the dive every time we dance...
Yep, she was one of those artists, I liked simply because she was pretty. She had pretty curly hair and a doll face and the song and video were peculiar so it stuck with me. I recall she was pregnant when she shot the video which shocked the hell outta me. Pregnant? Young? Unmarried? How did that happen? Seriously, I didn't know that happened when I was a kid.
And?
Looks like she is still recording and touring around Europe.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Neneh_Cherry
Thursday, September 20, 2007
To Nappy or Not?
I'm trying to grow my hair out now; the more processed, colored parts before I do go quasi-natural so I'll have some length to play around with.
What ya'll think?
I mean at this rate, I'm ready to shave my head bald, I'm so sick of dealing with hair.
Sunday, September 16, 2007
(Some) Men Are So Damn Oblivious!
Case in point. Friday night, I’m walking down Charles St. alone and on my way somewhere when some dude (of course) says a “Hi, how ya doin”. I say “Good” and keep on going, like I always do. He then makes some comment about how he wants to hold my hand. I’m still walking, don’t look back, keep on going. Why would I stop? Or even engage him in any kind of convo? I then think, what if he put himself in my shoes? And he was then the young, unescorted woman, walking down a city street, close to midnight, and some random, anonymous dude spoke, gestured or commented on knowing your name, where you’re going or whether they can get to know you or worse touch you? How would he feel? Not as a man being gawked at by a woman (who wouldn’t love that?), but as a woman being stopped by a man? It’s not appealing, its not desirable and its not at all wanted. Really. Add on to that, that you are an attractive woman who gets honked at, beeped at, hollered at, catcalled, yelled at and stopped on a daily basis and this particular incident just becomes one of hundreds of annoyances that build a further barrier to keep more and more vagrants out.
But I’m sure he never considered that. He’s just some yo on the street, incapable of thinking outside the small world he lives in. I do think, however, that if more of these kind of guys put themselves in women’s shoes and ask how they’d feel to be here, they might have a better understanding of why so many of us are repulsed by them.
Baltimore: 6 Deaths in 16 Hours
All the deaths apparently occurred within a period of about 16 hours. Some
victims were killed on the streets, others in their homes and one at a bar. They
came from different walks of life and police say none of the deaths appear to be
related.
Or start packing. Seriously, I gotta get up outta here.
Thursday, September 13, 2007
Drinking and Driving?
Tuesday, September 11, 2007
Remembering 9/11
But its all over the radio and there is already talk of the large amounts of people trapped and unable to escape.
Kathy Griffin: My Hero of the Day
At some creative arts Emmy's ceremony, Kathy Griffin won an award for her show Life on the D-List (funny show) and she did what no one has done before and that which I've always wanted to do just to smite people: in giving her thanks she remarked that Jesus Christ had nothing to do with her getting the award. Fucking hilarious!
Her actual quote:
"...a lot of people come up here and thank Jesus for this award. I want you to know that no one had less to do with this award than Jesus."
Damn her for stealing my idea but kudos for doing it, even though the networks are going to censor it for its telecast this weekend claiming its offensive. Whatever! And how the hell is that more offensive than Sarah Silverman (who sucked!) saying that both Britney's kids were "mistakes" during her opening monologue on the VMAs Sunday night? I think taking pot shots at innocent children is way worse than not giving undue credit to someone who hasn't exactly been without his share of accolades.
Oh and I have to add that the Emmy for Best Song also went to SNL's famed "Dick in a Box" short but the Catholic League doesn't appear to have any problem with that. PPfffffffffff, whatever!!
I love Kathy Griffin. I'll buy her a drink in hell!
Sunday, September 9, 2007
Can Britney Make A Comeback?
Dream Men of the Moment
Why? As the star of Nip/Tuck, he is worth tuning in every week just to see his kinky sex scenes and (kudos to FX for showing some bare ass on basic cable). He portrays a classic bad boy. And he could ____ my _____ anytime he wanted to. You fill in those blanks.
Why? This one is simple, he sings pretty, reminicent of Stevie Wonder, plays the piano, has pretty bubblin brown sugar skin and sings lovely songs about love. I keep hearing, though, that he might be gay but Ihavne't found any concrete eveidence of this yet. Regardless, he is adorable.
Why? I really can't even pinpoint why. It's just something about him. When I saw him acting in some film, he just stayed with me. It's like he has a perfect mix of street knowledge and cred mixed with real intellectual smarts. Like he could be the broke, mofo 'round the corner or the executive on the board room. Then rap on top of that. I dig that. And he aint bad looking either. Most definitely!
Why? He just has this everyday, every man, totally down to earth attainability like I could get a guy as lovable as he portrays himself on screen. Lots of his characters are vulnerable, lovelorn and totally sweet. I seriously would marry a guy like him. Dark hair, intense eyes, sensitive, adorable. He's the type of guy you want to give your heart to and make him happy.
Wednesday, September 5, 2007
Ick! Dumb Fuckery on Myspace
- you are 40 years old, you are too old to be browsing profiles on Myspace.
- you write me using broken English, ebonics and other hood colloquialisms, your messages will be automatically deleted. Turn ons for me are complete thoughts, sentences and proper punctuation.
- you send me a vague hello without a picture and an incomplete profile, I will not write back. Why should I take the time to write a nameless, faceless, interest-less, anonymous person with no background info? Why should I care?
- your profile is rank with big booty girls and half naked chicks, I DON'T want to be associated with you nor do I want to know anything more about you. And never will I want to be added to your collection.
- you call me "ma", "sweetie", "baby", "boo" or "cutie", the message will be trashed. You don't know me and I don't appreciate being acknowledged like that. It's young. Grow up!
- you claim to make over $100k, while being pictured standing in front of a Hyundai (or Kia or Chevy or Dodge). I'm not some 19 year old looking for a sugar Daddy, I don't believe a word of it AND I couldn't care less. Unimpressed.
- you have nothing but poor pictures of yourself using your cell phone camera (which takes awful pics). They look horrible. Make you look uglier and does not sweeten the deal to get to know you. WORSE is if these pics are taken in the bathroom with no shirt on. I have NEVER seen a guy (muscle-bound or not) look good this way. It makes you look cheap, silly, dirty and trifling. Invest in a digital camera and recruit a good friend to snap some decent shots. Put effort into how you present yourself, especially to strangers.
- you write me vividly describing what you want to do to me sexually, you will be BLOCKED and I will never accept a message from you again. If you believe this is appropriate or appealing you obviously dont know me and NEVER WILL!
- you write me to try and hook up with one of my friends, FUCK OFF! And yes, I will warn them in advance about you.
- your profile covers the gamut of pimp and gangsta imagery; butt naked booty skanks, money, rims, pimped-out cars, loud, southern rap music blaring and the like, we're not going to have anything in common. Don't expect a response.
- you fancy yourself as a novice photographer, videographer, writer, producer, director or manager and your profile and/or work looks like shit, I won't want to work with you.
- you send me unsolicited photos or your penis or other body parts, I will save it to my computer and submit the pics to various websites all other the net. You'll get your 15 minutes of fame.
That should cover it for now. I'm sure I'll be updating this list when needed.
Tuesday, September 4, 2007
Proactiv, Rescuing Stars from "Acne"?
Is Baltimore Stepping Up?
So Labor Day weekend rolls around and I was trying to find some hot spots to do dancing. I get an email from my usual favorite dance spot about a party going on Sunday night. I email the promoter back (who will remain nameless) to ask about the cover, since it wasn't posted. Mind you, this club I used to get into for free before 10pm not but a year prior. After that, it was $10. I wanted to spit out my coffee when he replied and told me the cover, all night was now $20. $20! To get into a club? In Baltimore? The same one I've frequently for years! Oh, I was hot. The last time I spent that on cover charge, my butt was in Miami! Umm, who do they think they are charging $20 for a club whose dancefloor hasn't gotten any bigger and I'm sure whose clientele (by that, I mean the men) aren't any better either? This is not DC! Then he had the nerve to add that $20 is the going rate for any "quality entertainment" that night in town.
Pffff!
Well, my friend and I decided to hit 2 other parties that offered free covers for ladies before 11:30pm and you could circulate between the two. As I was sitting at the bar ordering the biggest alcoholic drink I'd heard of, we then noticed the other ladies trickling in and couldn't help but notice all the hoochie-fied, short, short skirts, long, waist-long weaves and 5-inch stripper heels sauntering in. I mean, you'd have thought this was casting calls for video vixens. not saying they looked cute but they certainly were trying real hard. My friend judged by the way they were dressed and said it reminded her of South Beach. I thought for a 2nd. Then paid for my $10 drink and remembered, I also spent $10 the previous week on a Long Island ice tea. I never used to spend that kind of dough on mixed drinks before. I turned to my friend and asked 'Is is possible Baltimore really is trying to step it up? And be more like DC and Miami?' I even read online about a proposal to build a red line and a green line. And now that I think about it, I'm hearing more and more people talking about how Bmore is getting more and more expensive. Real estate, property taxes, everything has been going up even more.
Could it be? Is Baltimore really stepping up? I guess time will tell? Mine here, though, could be running out.